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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Looking for Signs

I have a bad habit of trying to find a deeper meaning to random little occurrences. I think this is a natural human tendency, our brains like to find patterns. Also, it's so difficult to not be in control of life, so we assign meanings to things to make us feel like everything is operating as it should and something in the universe has our best interests at heart. At least, I do that.

I do believe in karmic consequence, everything happens for a reason, all that stuff. But is it a sign from God if you, for example, get a good parking space? Is there a deeper meaning to finding the color placemat you were hoping for at Home Goods?

An example of how this thinking has gotten me into trouble:

A few years ago I was over at a new guy's house for the first time and I felt incredibly nervous, I realized very suddenly that I was in over my head and I had gone too far too fast with him. But then a song that I love came on the radio. I felt more relaxed immediately and every time I felt panic in that relationship, I thought of that song unexpectedly playing and convinced myself that it had been a sign. That relationship was very bad and never should have gone past the first date.

When I meet a new guy, I look for stupid, weird things that we have in common rather than the important things to have in common! Maybe it's from reading too many romantic stories, but I put too much weight on something like we have names that start with the same letter or we have the same color car. (Those are not real examples, but that's the idea).

I'm trying not to look for signs in everything, not to think that little coincidences are God trying to tell me something!

A Facebook friend recently wrote: Is there really such a thing as "signs"??

Several people made jokes about street signs, but I said: Every time I think something is a "sign" from the universe, I end up making a really bad decision based on it.

I can't live my life based on what I think are "signs." Maybe there really are signs, but my ability to correctly interpret them is clearly broken!

What do you think?


  1. Aargh. Wrote a long comment and Blogger ate it.

    So there was this guy. He got stuck on top of his house in a flood. It rained and rained and the water kept rising. He told himself "God will provide" and prayed. A little while later, a man came by in a rowboat. "Get in!" he said, and the man replied "no, God will provide." The water rose some more. The police came by in a speedboat. "Sir, we're here to rescue you!" they said, but he refused, saying "God will provide." The man drowned. When he met God, he was furious. "Why didn't you help me?" he asked. God replied, "Didn't you get the two boats I sent?"

    The trick is to see the right signs.

  2. Oh yes! I forgot about that story. I like that one a lot.

  3. J, the friend you met, reminded me of it on the car trip back! Very timely!

  4. I think that looking for things we have in common when we meet someone is just human. I expect that signs are few and far between when we meet most other people. The reason is we each have the free will to make what we want of things. Karma might put us into a difficult place, even a dangerous one - but someone has the free will to harm us or jut to move on.

    Clear signs only come with exceptional people, gurus and holy people, where it is certain that they will act in a way that is auspicious. Maybe there are warning signs for very, very bad people too - but when it comes to most people the future is in our hands.

  5. I think this is a natural human tendency, our brains.I do believe in karmic consequence, everything happens for a reason.
    Every man can depend in our mind creating and destiny.This is superstitutions.