On the Facebook page, Bhismah Arya posted an article about the Gayatri mantra. It reminded me that chanting of the Vedic prayers is a great way to calm the inner turmoil that has been stirred up by the arguing I've been doing lately with the "soulman" commenter.
He can believe if he wants to that I will never be accepted by the Indian community, but that has not been my experience. He can believe that people are just being polite and secretly thinking I'm just playing with my faith. Most of the people at my temple have expressed amazement and joy that I understand Hinduism on the level that I do (more so than most Indians, they often tell me!) But people can go ahead and think that I'm just playing around with this faith if they want. People can think whatever it is they are going to think. I can't control that.
Apparently to be taken seriously he believes I must marry someone random that I don't even like (but I've tried that! I got rejected for marriage by someone in my community as well as by a Hindu Advaita man). So he will continue to believe that my refusal to marry someone only for the sake of being taken seriously in my religion is an inappropriate choice. It's good to know that some people will always think that and I cannot be responsible for anyone's beliefs but my own.
At the same time, only I am responsible for my feelings and my behaviors. So if I'm wrong, then I take the consequences of being wrong. No need to anyone else to get worked up about my spiritual progress.
The fact is, this commenter is making accusations about my character that I don't have to listen to. His comments will no longer be published.
Now, let us all enjoy the beautiful hymns that I grew up listening to. My mother used to sing these to me as lullabies. :)
I also found this girl who appears to be a white convert to Hinduism singing bhajans. She's got a beautiful voice!
He can believe if he wants to that I will never be accepted by the Indian community, but that has not been my experience. He can believe that people are just being polite and secretly thinking I'm just playing with my faith. Most of the people at my temple have expressed amazement and joy that I understand Hinduism on the level that I do (more so than most Indians, they often tell me!) But people can go ahead and think that I'm just playing around with this faith if they want. People can think whatever it is they are going to think. I can't control that.
Apparently to be taken seriously he believes I must marry someone random that I don't even like (but I've tried that! I got rejected for marriage by someone in my community as well as by a Hindu Advaita man). So he will continue to believe that my refusal to marry someone only for the sake of being taken seriously in my religion is an inappropriate choice. It's good to know that some people will always think that and I cannot be responsible for anyone's beliefs but my own.
At the same time, only I am responsible for my feelings and my behaviors. So if I'm wrong, then I take the consequences of being wrong. No need to anyone else to get worked up about my spiritual progress.
The fact is, this commenter is making accusations about my character that I don't have to listen to. His comments will no longer be published.
Now, let us all enjoy the beautiful hymns that I grew up listening to. My mother used to sing these to me as lullabies. :)
This reminds me that all I need to do is commune with the divine and enjoy my unique relationship with the universe.
Hi Amba,
ReplyDeleteReading your recent post and earlier post i realized that you have received as many negative
comments as positive comments, so we can be sure that You are on right track in following
Dharma as 50% people agree with you. I believe that what we can do in our live is just to
follow one's Karma
"Karmanye Vadhikaraste, Ma phaleshou kada chana,
Ma Karma Phala Hetur Bhurmatey Sangostva Akarmani"
Rest will fall in place accordingly.
True, true! :)
DeleteYou were raised as a Hindu by your parents. I don't see where the problem lies.
ReplyDelete>>He can believe that people are just being polite and secretly thinking I'm just playing with my faith.
Even if they do think that, what business is it of yours what they are thinking in secret?
>>Most of the people at my temple have expressed amazement and joy that I understand Hinduism on the level that I do (more so than most Indians, they often tell me!)
I always get really uncomfortable when someone says something like that to me. I wonder if it's just flattery, or if the reason I would know so much is because I have a focused view of something - having come to it later with adult cognitive skills - that they have a holistic view of because they grew up surrounded by it. Usually people with a more focused view are people who have actively studied it -- priests and converts.
And focus without a more holistic view can indeed lead to a narrow understanding, which is why it is important to watch and listen so much. Learn as much as you can by experiencing what is around you, not just by thinking about it.
>>Apparently to be taken seriously he believes I must marry someone random that I don't even like
That's in order for soulman386 to take you seriously. But by the spiteful words that s/he has used, they have shown that they are certainly not a person whose opinion of me I wouldn't care about in the least. This person is bitter, hateful, and has a lot of personal progress to make before I can consider them someone wise enough to be giving me guidance in life.
"I always get really uncomfortable when someone says something like that to me."
DeleteYES! Me too. It's kind of weird and I'm never quite sure what to say. I get that a lot and I realize they're complimenting me, but it definitely turns things awkward. I'm thinking, "And why are you so amazed that I know some basic element of my religion?"
(I got this from my bharatnatyam teacher too when she was absolutely floored that I knew the story of Shiva drinking poison that was the basis of the dance we were doing. Is it really so hard to believe that I've heard that story?)
Lots of Americans know NOTHING of Indian cultural elements outside of the Taj Mahal, terrorism (yeah yeah, I know, but it is like that), and Slumdog Millionaire. Oh, and saris, bangles, bindis, and red dots. And curry.
DeleteSo I think that an NRI, after having been bombarded with this incredible ignorance Americans have, might indeed be shocked that you know something more than what the typical American knows or thinks about India.
And I don't think I know that story, lol
Hahaha. I suppose you're right.
DeleteThese are exactly the issues i think about when i look into the future for my own children.
ReplyDeleteBut, given the alternative, which is blind ignorance....i take the leap and hope for the best.
A hug for you today...keep striving...it's all between you and Beloved anyway. Hari Om Beloved<3
*hugs* Thank you :)
Deleteईशा वास्यमिदँ सर्वं यत्किञ्च जगत्यां जगत् ।
ReplyDeleteतेन त्यक्तेन भुञ्जीथा मा गृधः कस्यस्विद्धनम् ।। (यजुर्वेद ४०.१)
O Human! The entire world – static as well as dynamic – is pervaded by Ishwar – the Supreme Lord. Hence enjoy the pleasures in a detached manner. Do not be greedy. This wealth does not belong to anyone.
http://agniveer.com/ishopanishad-mantra-1/
Don't let random trolls get to you. Your life is yours and what you do with it is up to you. As long as you're doing what you know is right and what you believe in the rest of these people don't matter. As for marriage, someone out there is the perfect match for you. You may not have found him yet, he may not be Indian, he may not be white, and he might be your next door neighbor but it is not your time yet. Be patient and keep your chin up.
ReplyDeleteHi Ambaa,
ReplyDeleteyour ordeal is altogether of different level,being Indian and in peace with my faith I hardly relate to you,and can only imagine your ordeal,
but kudos to you for being able to think clearly and objectively and doing what is right despite of being subjected to such criticism and negativity and I wish all the happiness to you and enlightenment to born critics :)
Thank you to everyone for your kindness! :)
ReplyDelete